kennedy

We start our day with the queen herself, it’s Britney B(*&).

Britney Spears holds her Best Pop Video

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She will announce a two-year residency at Las Vegas’ Planet Hollywood this morning.  The announcement will happen at 8, but I already know what’s going down.  She is signing a two-year deal valued at $30 million.  That’s 48 shows at $310,000 per show!!  Not bad work for a girl we all thought was done for a few years ago.

She is taking about 1300 people into the Mojave desert at 4am PST to make the announcement.  All of the attendees who will be bussed out had to be between 5′ and 6′ tall – guess we will find out why at 9am.  The announcenment itself will cost roughly $100,000 to include busses, tents, craft services and lots of Gatorate and Red Bull.

Rumor has it Britney will be performing her new single “Work Bi(*)” and then give all the specifics about her Vegas residency that will debut in December.  I love love love this song.

Lindsay Lohan Surrenders

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Mother of the Year Dina Lohan turned 51 on Sunday, and celebrated her release from jail with all her kids.  The one thing not invited was ALCOHOL.  The whole fan-damily got together and noone drank at all.  I think somewhere an an angel got it’s wings.  Or Syria destroyed it’s own chemical weapons.  Or a Miss America got her wish and there will be world peace in our day.  I mean, someone needs to check with the Pope to see if that qualifies as a miracle.

Spike TV's "Guys Choice 2013" - Show

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And finally this morning, Marky Mark can now add High School Graduate to his list of Funky Bunch accomplishments.  He finished up in June and just now let everyone know.  He was being tutored and taking on line classes while filming 2 Guns with Denzel, but never let on what he was doing.

One might wonder why he never got his sheepskin… well, he got kicked out of the 9th grade after being charged with attempted murder.  So, that happened.  But now he goes to church every day, got all his tats removed and loves his kids.  How life has changed.  I liked him better like this.

SEE ALSO: Read MORE ‘Dirty On The 30’

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